A Day in the Life

Every day a different life,

A different job, a different strife.

With every day that I get old,

A new piece of me retold.

Location: River Grove, Illinois, United States

Saturday, September 03, 2005

Today, an Alcoholic?

To start off, no, I never really have gotten drunk before. Very tipsy, yes, but never drunk. I really don't see the appeal in stumbling foolishly around the room, making an ass of myself, throwing up for several hours, and/or not being able to remember the previous night.

I have come to realize something though. I do enjoy being tipsy, in that, I enjoy the sudden and often unexpected giggles brought about by a drink or two. (or more if we're talking mudslides and pina coladas...yummy!) I have also realized that I most likely have the alcoholism gene somewhere in my body. I've never quite figured out where those things hide.

So, I'm left with a most troubling question; what to do? Do I ignore the fact that I might have this illness and just drink away? I think not. I have to accept the fact that I have limitations. Should I quit drinking all-together? Perhaps. It is the safest route, albiet it is the least exciting. Perhaps I should just limit myself to only a couple drinks every time I go out (which is still only a couple times a year). Yeah, I know, loser.

It's rough, you know, growing up and all. Sometimes maturity means being able to accept one's own fate, and sometimes it means being able to deal with it. I've already accepted the fact that I'm more than susceptible to alcoholism. I've seen what that stuff can do to a person. It ruins lives. On the other hand, in small doses it can actually make one a very enjoyable person. It's sad to think that having a few drinks actually makes me a happier person. Hell, I can count the times I've been happy on one hand.

I'll leave it at this; I've got my own battle to fight. Whatever happens, I'm not going to become some stupid drunk. As for you out there who have surrendered to the temptation, just try to make sure you don't let that stuff ruin your life or anyone else's. Please, don't drink and drive. Don't drink and operate heavy machinery either...or firearms. That just scares the shit out of me. I don't really care if people go to frat parties and drink and pass out and throw up. It honestly makes me sick to think that those same people are going to be the ones who will abuse their spouses and children verbally and physically. For the love of whatever god in which you believe, get some help as soon as possible. I already know some of my friends (using that term loosely) who will lose the war.

If at this point you even considered the fact that I might be talking about you, then you need help.

Pass it on.


Blogger Annie said...

Nick, once again I'm so proud of you. I know that you enjoyed drinking those couple of times and the fact that you would give that up in college, where there's opportunities to do it all the time, is amazing. You're right, true alcoholism is a very scary thing. You are different from so many people out there because you've realized that you are susceptible to alcoholism way before it's too late, and you're doing something to stop it. Good for you. And I mean it. We've talked about all of this before though...and you know my full thought on the situation. But I really am proud of you.

8:32 AM  
Blogger George said...

One of those legendary Woody Allen lines is that '80% of success is just showing up'; I think it's kinda the same here. Seeing the potential for a problem and realizing that everyone has their limits is one of the hallmarks against alcoholism... and you already have that.

8:34 PM  

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